It’s been 10 weeks now since by Prophylactic Bilateral Mastectomy and about time I provided an update on how things are progressing in my life after surgery.
In all honesty, things are getting back to my pre-surgery routine and I must admit that most days I completely forget that I’ve even been through the procedure. Don’t get me wrong, when you see me naked, it’s clear what I’ve been through, but in reality there are not a lot of people who see me naked!
When I am naked, such as in the cropped image below, I really don’t feel ashamed, embarrassed or different to any other woman of any shape, size or colour. Previously, if I was to look at this picture of my body when I had breasts and nipples (and I won’t post that image here in the public domain), I’d probably have started to pick on my ‘abnormalities’, you know the things that don’t meet up to the ‘standards’ thrust upon us in the media.
Right now when I look at this image, I just see ‘normal’.
When I undress daily, I no longer notice the scars and I certainly don’t see the foobs any differently to how I saw my breasts before they were removed. Yes they’re hard, they are at times uncomfortable and they definitely don’t function in the same way as my boobs once did, but they are just ‘normal’ to me now.
I’ve been out and about more too, including a several engagement parties, a dual 50th birthday, a twins 40th and whether it was in or out of the moon boot, I’ve had fun and enjoyed reconnecting with my beautifully supportive friends and family.
Some conversations and catch ups have seen the foob topic discussed, and I have often found myself coming back to one similar point in all of the discussions. Life after surgery is ‘normal’ again. While I don’t want to take away from the enormity of what’s involved in a prophylactic bilateral mastectomy, nor do I want to dilute the procedure itself, I am just keeping calm and carrying on. I underwent major surgery, it’s invasive and not without serious risk, however if I’m to be truly honest with you and with myself, my personal experience hasn’t really been ‘that big a deal’.
I love that my friends feel comfortable asking me questions, it’s one of the reasons I wanted to do this blog in the first place. One of my main motivators was the fact that I didn’t want people to be ‘weird’ around me after the process was all done and dusted. Some of my friends look at my foobs, some ask to see them, some even touch them (which I’m perfectly fine with) and some don’t even notice anything different at all. I’m certain that a large proportion of my friends don’t even have time to read my blog, so a lot of people I see regularly probably have no idea of the journey I’ve been on and I actually love that too.
Our little family is just carrying on with life and none of us really even notice it much these days.
I look back on the blog to remind myself of what I have been through and it honestly feels like a lifetime ago. Some of he most popular posts in the blog process have surprised me, with by far the most read article being the blog written by a good friend of mine. It’s titled ‘You’re removing your boobs? A Man’s Perspective..’. It’s truly a special post, and I think that I love it most because it helps me see it from someone else’s perspective.
Another popular post was definitely the one I shared with our girls in it called ‘Their Perspective’. The innocence of their understanding of the journey, their honesty, their faces – it all melts my heart and I’m so grateful that my husband talked me into writing the blog in the first place. I think we have the most amazing girls in the whole wide world!!
We all celebrated a special milestone late last month, which was the very important event of it being our 15 year wedding anniversary. In our family, we have a little tradition where we make personal cards for one another, and I share with you the amazingly thoughtful card I woke to on our special anniversary morning.
We went out to dinner as a family, enjoyed company with each other and even snapped up a little couple selfie, including the ‘forks’ in the background thanks to our cheeky eldest daughter.
I know how lucky I am to have this guy in my life, he’s been an absolute dream when it comes to supporting what I’ve done.
The next step in this process is my scheduled visit with the Doctor later this month. We will look at how the foobs have coped with the expansion and a decision will be made as to when the reconstruction will take place.
Until then, I’ll continue to train daily, keep busy, work hard and get on with life. I’m so very grateful to have you come along for the journey, thank you.